• Podcast
  • Reviews
  • NJ IPA Podcast
  • About
  • Search
  • Podcast
  • Reviews
  • NJ IPA Podcast
  • About
  • Search
SCENE IT ALL BEFORE

Pirates of the Caribbean 5: Someone Has  To Pay A Lot Of Alimony

5/25/2017

0 Comments

 

Dead Men Tell No Tales REviewed

God, remember how good the original Pirates of Caribbean was? That's all I was thinking about as I watched the fifth installment of this lazy, money grab of a franchise. The fifth. As I was writing my review for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, I kept calling it the fourth movie because I completely forgot about the one starring Penelope Cruz, which is amazing, considering On Stranger Tides is the 23rd highest grossing film OF ALL TIME. When pressed, I can only think of one guy who loves this series, though besides him I've never heard of anyone counting down the days until the newest Pirates movie. But as long as people keep buying tickets I imagine Disney will keep making them. 

This story is a mess. There are about six different groups of people looking for Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) despite no character giving us an actual reason as to why they need to find him. The only person who provides any sort of motivation for finding Jack is the ghost pirate Salazar (Javier Bardem) who wants revenge. There is also a storyline involving a treasured trident that can break any curse, which can only be found with a book that needs a crystal. TL;DR Jack Sparrow wanders around drinking rum and then defeats the bad guys. 

Johnny Depp has played this part so many times he could probably do it in his sleep which, if I'm being honest, is what it felt like. You have to think that with his divorce and everything else going on in his personal life that the movie was affected. At the very least it threw off the director’s schedule, so much so that the studio had to put a production assistant outside Depp’s house to let the crew know when he woke up. Luckily, Captain Jack really likes rum so if Depp ever showed up to set drunk he could just tell everyone he was being method.
Picture
You know what I really like about this movie? The music. I love the instrumental soundtrack for this franchise.
​The new actors playing the de facto Will and Elizabeth—Brenton Thwaites and Kaya Scodelario—aren't quite as good as Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley, but for a discounted rate they have enough chemistry to be enjoyable. They match the performances given by Depp, Geoffrey Rush, and Javier Bardem, who is more difficult to understand than usual as he uses a cartoonish Spanish accent. 

There are some redeemable aspects to this movie. The action and the fight scenes are well-staged and fun to watch. There are a couple of other cool CGI scenes—one involving a guillotine, and the other a flashback featuring a younger looking Johnny Depp. However, for every good use of CGI, there was something that didn't look as good. For example, the ghosts look silly due in part to giant portions of their body being missing. There are also scenes involving characters walking in the ocean that don't look quite right.

This is the shortest movie in the series at two hours and nine minutes and still feels like it takes forever to get through. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is better than the second and the third one but what is that really saying? You can wait to watch this movie on HBO if you’re looking for something new, but not too new that you might actually have to pay attention. D
0 Comments

Top 5 Summer Series To Look Forward To

5/18/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
Not only is this summer movie season but it's also summer TV season. It used to be that in the summer there would be nothing to watch. But now with companies like Netflix and Amazon so heavily in the TV game, we have a lot of bingable new shows to watch. So clear your weekend and get the couch ready because summer TV is coming.

A warning – I will be talking about previous seasons of the shows I mention. So if you are not caught up look away from the description.

Honorable Mention/Show I should be excited about but know nothing about:
Twin Peaks (May 21st on Showtime)
I’ve seen the promos, I’ve seen the interviews, I’ve seen friends on social media going crazy for the show but I have no idea what Twin Peaks is. I know it was one of the top rated shows on ABC in 1990, and that in 1991 the ratings dropped so dramatically that the series was canceled. I know that it was created by David Lynch and he is coming back to direct every single episode. But because Lynch has forbidden his cast members from talking about the plot I know nothing else about this show.  All that being said I really need to know – should I watch the new season? Should I go back and watch the first two seasons? Also what the heck is this show even about? Keep me posted Twin Peaks fans. 
​
5) Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (May 19th on Netflix)
As of this printing, the new season of Kimmy Schmidt is already out on Netflix which means there is a chance some people have already watched the entire season. But most likely if it's raining or if it's too hot outside you will be watching it this weekend. It looks like this season will feature Kimmy (Ellie Kemper) in college with more appearances from Reverend Richard Wayne Gary Wayne (Jon Hamm). But really all I want to see is Lillian (Carol Kane) helping Titus (Tituss Burgess) into his yellow dress and going full ‘Lemonade’ on someone. This show is so incredibly upbeat and quotable. Don’t think so? While I'm watching the show with my partner I don’t think I can make it through a conversation with her without hearing a line from the show. F 10 Cincos 4 Lyfe.

4) House of Cards (May 30th on Netflix)
I don’t know if I’m actually ready to watch this season given how American politics has played out over the past year. Season 5 looks to pick up just weeks before the election after a damning article about Frank Underwood (Kevin Spacey) and his rise to power has come out. I have no idea how the Underwoods will come back from that but I also could not have predicted this Presidency so I am sure the outcome will be far less outlandish than I imagine. You have to wonder if we will see any parallels to the current administration and just how far Frank and Claire (Robin Wright) will go to keep power and make the terror.
​
3) Orange is the New Black (June 9th on Netflix)
It's kind of impressive that the weakest thing about this show is the main character. Luckily whoever's in charge of the writing has pushed Piper (Taylor Schilling) to the background and made room for some of the other more colorful characters at Litchfield. This season will be dealing with the fallout to one of the fan favorites being murdered and the prisoners demanding better treatment since the day-to-day operations were taken over by a corporation. The show mixes social commentary with humor and I am excited to see how much of each we will get this season. ​

2) GLOW (June 23rd on Netflix)
The only new series on the list but this show is right in my wheelhouse. In fact, while I was in college I did a multimedia video project about a similar group in Boston called B.L.O.W.W. This new Netflix series is a fictional retelling of an actual group of women wrestlers from the eighties that stars Alison Brie and Marc Maron. The series gets increased credibility due in part to the fact that Orange is the New Black creator Jenji Kohan is helping produce the show. Give me a Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka jump off the top of the cage before the series ends and that will be enough for me. 

1) Game of Thrones (July 16th on HBO)
Oh my God we've been waiting so long for this show to come back. It's been over a year now and adding to the frustration is we only have 13 episodes left with seven episodes this season and six the next. That seems like a lot to cram in when there are two more books worth of content left to unfold. But that means there will be no messing around this season. Winter is here, Cersei is on the throne, and Dani is coming for it. Bring on the white walkers and that opening theme music because I am ready for it. 
0 Comments

Why Don't We Just Leave The Sword In The Stone

5/11/2017

0 Comments

 

King Arthur Reviewed 

Good God—another King Arthur movie? Are we really doing this again? It feels like we get one of these every few years, even if the last adaptation was the 2004 Clive Owen movie. But studio executives know that Game of Thrones is the hottest property in all of TV right now. So why not strike while the dragons and swords are hot and roll out a movie with the most famous knight of all time? (With the possible exception of the Knights who say "Ni!")
 
About midway through King Arthur: Legend of the Sword, it became apparent that director Guy Ritchie didn't care too much about the story. I think he went into this project knowing that everyone has the basic gist of the Arthurian legend; he just wanted to do all his cool camera tricks. So he traded Lancelot for giant, magic elephants and sleek masked warriors wearing impractical armor.
 
No matter what you think of Guy Ritchie as a director, most people will agree it is fun watching his movies. There are lots of fast edits, cool camera tricks, solid fight cinematography, and did I mention the fast edits? Richie uses as many effects as his budget will allow, and for his effort, the movie looks good and is fun to watch, especially the scenes that are set to music.
 

The CGI doesn't come off as incredibly realistic; the monsters and giant beasts look more cartoonish than anything. But were you really not going to be able to tell that the giant smoke monster isn't real? This type of animation matches the fantastical epic feel Richie is trying to create, so it makes sense as long as you’ve already accepted the previous silliness.  ​
Picture
What every King Arthur movie needs - ninja fighting.
I like Charlie Hunnam as a lead–I liked him and Sons of Anarchy and I liked him in Pacific Rim. At the very least Hunnam seemed properly cast; he can tough-guy banter with the best of them, which is exactly what a Guy Richie movie needs. I just can’t figure out why his characters are never more engaging or memorable. He’s a good actor, if not a little vanilla. But does it get any more vanilla than Arthur?
 
To that end, it's hard to for me to believe I've made it this far without talking about Jude Law, but really he’s there for his trademark sneer more than anything else. The evil magic king he plays is more of a prop than a character. 
 
The movie felt a lot longer than it actually is. I found myself checking my watch in the middle of the movie, which is unfortunate because I liked what I saw in the beginning and the end.  If you like slo-mo fighting sequences and can't get enough of knights and magic you could do worse than King Arthur: Legend of the Sword. The effort is in the effects, but after hearing about the round table for the umpteenth time, I need a break, and maybe a little more character definition. It’s comforting to know we are less than ten weeks away from the winds of winter, so you may be better off watching the Battle of Hardhome again while you wait for this one to come to HBO.    D
0 Comments

Hooked On A Feeling

5/4/2017

0 Comments

 

Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2 Reviewes

Is it possible to be a Marvel hipster? Can I do it without sounding like a douchebag? If so I knew Guardians of the Galaxy was going to be a hit when most people still had no idea why Vin Diesel was going to play a talking tree. The format of the comic and the people they cast gave me a spidey-sense that this was going to be a big movie. That year Guardians was my second favorite movie of the year and it grossed $773 million. Expectations are high for Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2 but this movie is the perfect combination of action and comedy that has made Marvel one of the most profitable studios in Hollywood.
 
I want to say the story for the sequel doesn't matter as much. You're not here for the story; you're here for the franchise and the team. But for those of you curious, this movie is about Peter Quill (Chris Pratt) finding his father (Kurt Russell) and what that means for Starlord’s destiny. That is really all I can tell you without giving everything away. 
 
If you like the original Guardians you are obviously going to love this movie as well. The first movie caught people off guard; I don't think they were expecting it to be as funny as it was given its superhero backdrop. The sequel has a lot of the same energy but when people walk into the theater they are going to have an idea of what is coming. I don't know if this one is better than the original but I liked them equally. And even if you get dragged to this movie by the Marvel fan in your life you should be able to enjoy it.
 
Guardians 2 does sag a little bit in the middle, especially as they try to set up what's coming. Luckily they make sure the laughs never stop, even when the action does. The jokes in this movie work incredibly well; from the dialogue, to Baby Groot, to all the incredible 80s references I was laughing a lot. And for every moment that you are sitting there, hoping they stop explaining everything, all those explanations pay off in an action-packed and emotional final act. 
Picture
In case you are wondering the soundtrack to this movie is also pretty great.
The cast of this movie continues to shine. Obviously, Chris Pratt and Zoe Saldana are fantastic. I don't think there is anyone out there that doubts the star power of Chris Pratt, especially after this franchise and Jurassic World has made him one of the most recognizable faces on the planet. I never pictured Dave Bautista as a funny guy but I love Drax delivering deadpan lines and having an over-the-top laugh. Then there is Baby Groot, who has some of the best one-liners in the movie and Bradley Cooper who embodies everything that is Rocket. It was also nice seeing Michael Rooker's Yondu getting more to do this movie. Of all the new members to the team, his character adds the most depth to the story. 
 
Beyond the core members of the team, the cast surrounding our heroes is great. This includes Kurt Russell, who has been riding high on a much-deserved career resurgence, and several different big-name cameos.  Also of note, make sure you don't go anywhere after the movie ends because, typical of Marvel, there are a bunch of after credits sequences, including one all the way at the bitter end.
 
Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2 doesn't do anything to set up Avengers: Infinity War besides mention Thanos’s name a couple times, which to me is a good thing. I like these characters and I like how far away they are from everything going on in The Avengers world. I know they will eventually team up, but until then I'm enjoying letting the Guardians be one of the best aspects of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. 
A
0 Comments

    Categories

    All
    1920s
    2015
    Action
    A Nightmare On Elm Street
    Aquaman
    Baby Driver
    Batman
    Ben Affleck
    Black Panther
    Blade Runner
    Blade Runner 2049
    Bradley Cooper
    Charlie Hunnam
    Chris Messina
    Chris Pratt
    Christopher Nolan
    Coco
    Cyborg
    Dave Bautista
    DC
    Director
    Disney
    Drama
    Dunkirk
    Ferdinand
    Game Of Thrones
    Gangster
    GLOW
    Guardians Of The Galaxy
    Guardians Of The Galaxy Volume 2
    Guy Ritchie
    Happy Death Day
    House Of Cards
    I
    Jennifer Lawrence
    Jude Law
    Justice League
    King Arthur
    Kumail Nanjiani
    Live By Night
    Marvel
    Mob
    Movie
    Orange Is The New Black
    Oscar Picks
    Passengers
    Patton Oswalt
    Pixar
    Podcast
    Prohibition
    Rain Man
    Review
    Sci-Fi
    Space
    Spider Man
    Spider-Man
    Star Wars
    Suburbicon
    Superheroes
    Superman
    The Big Sick
    The Dark Tower
    The Faculty
    The Flash
    The Last Five Years
    The Last Jedi
    The Little Giants
    Tommy Boy
    Tonya
    Top Ten
    TV
    Twin Peaks
    Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
    Universe
    Vin Diesel
    Wonder
    Wonder Woman
    Zoe Saldana

    Archives

    May 2021
    February 2020
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.